Falling into Infinity

Falling Slowly

~*~*~

I had been falling
For so long
And came so far down
That I had forgotten
What it was that I was falling in

Until the realization
Crossed my mind
That I had fallen
Into a bottomless pit
Called love

~*~*~

A Heart Touched, A Soul Moved

The Muse’s Visit

~*~*~

The song had not left
The tip of her tongue,
Had not been penned in ink,
Or thought out in blood,
Before it filled in her heart
The wondrous joy of its coming.

Never had she met one
She could adore more,
Than the voice of a Songbird,
Singing deep and sad lore,
Of her wisdom gained,
And lovers lost to time.

Nor ever did she feel complete,
Without her favorite tune
Playing on the radio,
Electric guitar, and drumbeats,
To take her high and bring her low,
And finally settle for acoustic strings.

The poetry bled from her pen,
Onto pages waiting to be read,
Words that wrote themselves,
And she watched in wonder,
As each quivering page after another,
Filled with the ink of her thoughts.

Her dear Muse paid her a visit,
Bringing songs from afar as gifts,
And taking a little of her soul,
In the form of penned thoughts,
And music strummed from her guitar,
As a gift to the world beyond.

~*~*~

Caged Freedom

Freedom

~*~*~

Moving further away from reality,
The grass is no longer green
Or even a golden brown
Like the drop of apathy
Hanging heavy on the pavement.
There is no other side to look forward to
It has been embezzled by the present
And turned to a pile of rotting tomatoes
The show must go on
Though no one can remember
The last time it had been watched.

Illusions, the dearest of illusions,
Like shackles tying down the thoughts
Only wanting to pry free and elope
With the earliest breeze traveling to the north.
Where the hills rise up from the ground,
And the snow never melts,
Where rare crystal streams remind us of nature,
And what it is to be close to reality,
The same reality we have hidden
Behind grey buildings and tarred roads.

Eccentricity runs through the nerves
That brought to life these very words
But I am not afraid to be who I am.
In cages one is expected to live
Told tall tales about pseudo freedom
Garnished with lies and hypocrisy,
A friend today, a stranger tomorrow,
Only because one made the gravest mistake
Of being what they really believed in.
Then they tell me I can be free
Provided I follow the norms of society.

They can keep their freedom, tied up in a cage,
While I let mine roam the blue skies
For there is nothing wrong
With having different desires
And expectations from life
Than what billions before me have wanted.
Must I follow in the footsteps of the elders,
Who have left this world in ruins?
Maybe they can tie me, handcuff me to the walls
But my Spirit cannot be broken
My thirst for freedom cannot be quenched.
For I am not wrong, I just see things differently.

~*~*~

I guess I am greatly influenced by the movie, “Into the Wild”, and of course the soundtrack. There is a song which was especially on my mind, “Guaranteed”, somehow the lyrics affect me in ways I cannot describe.


Fire, Water, Air

Bridge to Terabithia

~*~*~

I found a verse you left me
From a different era
Locked up in the pages
Of a book I read long ago.
It spoke to me volumes
Of days that passed by
Secrets hidden under pillows
And forgotten over time.

The fire always lit inside of me
Courage in a different form
I would always try to play with it
Even though my finger would burn.
Now the flames are welcoming
And warms the air all around me
But I am afraid of stepping closer
Even though I have been burning all along.

The winding gravel road
Upon which we tread so softly
Grating sand under the sole of our feet
A sound which is music to my ears.
I should have seen this coming
When I first stepped onto the ground
But I waived away any such thoughts
As I walked down the track alone.

Like early spring showers
That wash away the tears
I’m soaked to the bone with joy
And I long for the dawn of each day.
Waves come splashing from distant shores
And I’m swimming under the sea
Calling out to my dry self on the beach
To jump in and smile with me.

This self-destruct button
Has finally been silenced
Though I never held any fear
Even if someday it would have gone off.
Yet you feared for me
I never understood why
Maybe because I am in love with pain
And you’ve been trying to set me free.

The winds of change are blowing
Changing directions, dancing
I’m caught in the current
No longer resisting this change.
It carries the sound of my heartbeat
With the fragrance of a new day
Through these sands of time
Changing, forever changing.

There is no permanence
This I have learned with time
These fleeting moments I cherish more
For we’re just like autumn leaves.
I close my eyes and see you smiling
Not so far away, yet not close enough
The leaves keep twirling
Until we too find ourselves lost.

~*~*~

I received the Perfect Poet Award for Week 41. I am honored to receive the award and I accept it. The above is my acceptance poem. I would like to nominate Lady Pen for the next award.

I am also submitting the above for Thursday Poets’ Rally Week 42 hosted by Jingle

The Game

Waiting for the Verdict

~*~*~

The clock was ticking.

She looked up with quiet desperation in her eyes; an almost crazed, starved, empty look, as if all feelings had died inside of her. Long ago she had come to terms with the fact that she would not feel love for another human being ever again, as no one would love her in return. This was the thought which crossed her mind as she sat silently, waiting for the verdict.

He sat at the other end of the room, smoking a cigarette, gazing at her face, trying to understand the girl he fell in love with years ago. She was not like the other girls he had been with, she felt real, genuine, almost alive. For the first time in his life he had felt that he was with a girl who truly cared for him, and who was not just chasing after his money. How could eyes like hers lie to him?

Circumstances under which they had met flashed across her mind, she still remembered the vacant look his eyes held as he walked past her, hand in hand with a Barbie Doll. She wondered whether she had felt anything for him, but all her memories could bring back to her were her pretenses to get to him. Had he never aroused feelings of love in her heart of stone?

He searched for even the faintest trace of warmth in her face, but found nothing but cold indifference. What had he done to kill the soft warm glow of her eyes, the infinite depth of her smile? Could she be telling the truth about how she never felt anything for him, and only wanted his money? He had always known when a girl wanted him for his money, but this time he had been wrong, and this mistake could cost him everything.

“I love him, I love him not,” were the words playing in her mind as if they alone could decide her real emotions. Either she had felt nothing at all, or felt too much for him; either way, all she could do was let him down. She enjoyed the disappointment in his eyes, the hurt, painful look of a dog once much loved but now abandoned by its owner. Oh, the bottomless pit of betrayal.

He remembered the smile she gave him as she walked down the aisle in her white dress. The memory was almost a dream, from a life so far ago; it seemed so unreal. She always joked that life was a game, but he never thought she would play her cards so cleverly, hell, he did not even know she was playing cards at all. It was a tough move to judge, and her face was so expressionless.

The judge called order in the court, the verdict was out. She was to be allowed to keep the property, she had won. The divorce was granted. She got what she wanted. He looked at her face, she did not look happy, nor did she look unhappy. Her eyes met his for the flash of a second, and then she was gone.

The clock was ticking. Tick-tock tick-tock.

After a month of evening drinking, and morning hangovers, he received a note from her lawyer. She had returned his money, every single penny. Confusion was his first reaction, his second was a sense of understanding. He called her lawyer.

She sat at the airport, watching planes take off. A single tear slid down her cheeks, as she walked into life’s open arms.

~*~*~